The Lesson I learned the hard way...

Something I learned the hard way was who I really liked/loved. A good while back I was dating a guy I kind of liked but my friends saw it as a dead end relationship because he lived in the states, then they noticed a another guy hitting on me, and me being the completely slow and oblivious person I am, didn’t notice.

Now me and the first guy I was with, Blake, we were going out despite him living in the states for at least a year. Then one of my friends brought up one day that I should leave Blake for the new guy so that I would be dating someone who actually lived in Winnipeg. I protested for a bit but back then I was kind of a push over. . . So in the end I ended up caving and left Blake for Jeff. Worst mistake I ever made.

First off all, I hardly knew this damn guy and yet I ended up caving and trying to go out with some stranger because my friend insisted on it. She didn’t really know him either! We all met him at one of our anime conventions. So the most we knew was whatever we talked about during one day of the convention. So as a start to it all it wasn’t smart or smooth.

Second, I felt horrible for what I did to Blake, he didn’t deserve that out of blue let go like that. I didn’t have a good reason behind breaking up with him and I certainly was not going to tell him I was breaking up with him because my friends insisted on me dating someone in Winnipeg. In the end he ended up thinking it was his fault one way or the other too, which made me feel even worse about it.

The whole time I was with Jeff, always made me feel awkward too. I didn’t really feel the same way nor could I tell if his feelings were genuine and even if they were I still didn’t feel the same either way. I’m not sure what my family’s opinion was on him either since he was like a giant compared to me, me being 5’5 while he was like 7 feet. Plus he was like 3 or 4 years older than me, which also made me, feel a little awkward. Over all the whole relationship just never felt right to me.

In the end, if it wasn’t obvious, the relationship didn’t last. There was far to many things clashing between the two of us and I don’t believe in religion which apparently did it for him. Despite not agreeing on the relationship it still hit a little hard when he didn’t even have the guts to tell me face to face or even on the phone to break up with me, he did it via email.

So in the end I ended up single and alone. I lost contact with Blake after a point plus I didn’t have the nerve to talk to him after what I did. I had a huge fight with that friend over it and I still hold a small grudge over her for it. It was then after I was alone and couldn’t get a hold of Blake anymore that I realized, that I missed him very much.

Many years later however I ended up finding him online again and we started talking again and the ended up going out again. HAPPY ENDING!

Who Am I?

I am the daughter to Mike and Carrie Still. I have been their daughter from 1990 to this present day. I and my mother share a special bond by being born on her birthday, so every year we would do something together in honor of our birthdays. I am also a very big daddies girl.

I am an older sister to my brother Sean who is two years younger than me, and a younger (step) sister to my two older (step) sisters, Cara and Lacie Hall. Although they are my step sisters, our family never acknowledges it that way.

My sisters having kids made me an aunt more than once. I started being an aunty when I was actually rather young. I don’t remember the exact age for it was a long time ago but I was still in middle school. One of my best friends at the time used to be so jealous of me for being an aunt she wanted to be an aunty for such a long time.

After taking a break from school for a few years I finally returned to school and became a student again to graduate. Being a student is nothing special nor is being a returning student, although it makes everyone happy and gets them off my back which makes me happy. A student title is only a temporary thing so the minute one is done with school the title is gone.

Sam Funk and Brenlee Johnstone are my two best friends. Sam and I met originally in Junior High but we weren’t nearly as close then, it was more, “Hey you’re that kind of cool kid that sits next to me in class” sort of deal. It was in High School that we actually started talking and hanging out more and it during that time that we met Brenlee. We had some other friends at the time but we ended up growing apart from them except for us, we ended up sticking together. Although we don’t always find the time to hang out whether it is cause of school, work, or another obligation, we always in the end hang out every Friday evening to watch our shows or do something crazy.

Being a fan of music needless to say, made me a music lover. I love music and have a big hate for silence, I could live through silence for a bit but it really starts to bother me after a point. Music is generally what helps my moods and days too. If I’m feeling down I listen to something happy and it helps cheer me up and fix my day. Growing up I have just always enjoyed music and loved singing to them, and to this day I still do. I enjoy almost every kind of music too, hip hop, rap, techno, etc. Music is just awesome and helps make the world go round.

Besides being a big fan of music my biggest thing would probably have to be video games. Just like music I grew up with video games. We had a Super Nintendo back in the day and when I was really little me and my dad would play games like Mario, Hockey, Castlevania, Mortal Kombat and many other titles. Growing up I always had a gaming system and I still have all my old gaming system that I still play too. I always loved playing video games they were just the best, there’s so much to a video game that can help ones day.

 

The fact that I have a boyfriend also classifies me as a girlfriend. The most I have to say for this is the fact that I have a nice, loving and caring guy who in the end actually lives in the states and not in Canada. We still talk though through Xbox and webcams.

Personal Symbol

I guess something that would have “special” meaning behind it, would be my Xbox. Mostly cause I can’t think of ANYTHING else…

So the story behind my Xbox is that, it was the first expensive thing I ever bought myself, and with my own money. I always wanted an Xbox and I knew my parents were not going to buy me one, so after many months of working and saving up my money, I went and got myself an Xbox, complete with headset, game, extra controller, and controller charger. In the final end the whole thing ended up costing about 600 – 700 dollars, but it was totally worth it. It was the first ever big purchase I had ever done myself and paid for entirely by myself.

I guess in a way, it was sort of like a “start” at becoming an adult, or something along that. The time I got my first credit card and used it and paid it off would be more of a start or follow up to being an adult.

Ever since I got my Xbox, I love it. It is one of my favorite systems; I’m on it every day or very close. I have bought many games for it over the years and take very good care of it. When I found my first scratch on it, I kind of freaked a little… I got over it eventually. My Xbox is about 2 or 3 years old now too I think and still work’s perfectly fine, mind you, I also have a Super Nintendo older than me and that still works too.

Besides being an awesome game console my Xbox has also been a great help to talking with my boyfriend on Xbox live, on mic. My Xbox and the games help me get away from the world on occasion so I can mellow out and not think about things. Blowing something up randomly is always so relaxing (haha) it is just a nice stress reliever.

One Medium Suitcase

To start off, I would take clothes obviously. I don’t really have any favorite clothes though, so probably just items of clothing, wherever I would be going I could just buy new clothes so clothes isn’t a big deal for me. I would just need a couple to keep me dressed and warm or cool for wherever I happened to be going.

Two things I absolutely would have to have on me would be my laptop and my Xbox. I don’t care where we go but if I wasn’t coming back home those two things I HAVE to have. They are one of the few ways I have to keep in contact with my boyfriend, so I need to have them, plus they are great entertainment and give me things to do and help me work. No matter where we went I would find a television to hook my Xbox up to, whether the place provides me with one, or I go buy one. As for my laptop all I need is a plug to occasionally to charge it, and then it’s good. Although the Xbox isn’t nearly as useful without games I could possibly go without packing any, it would just mean I got to re-buy them all… which would be a giant pain but possible and would save me space. On the bright side though, my Xbox has some games programmed into it so I wouldn’t be at a total loss. If I had extra room I would probably throw in a game or two, depending on how much left over room I had.

It probably wouldn’t be a for sure needed thing in my suitcase but I would probably pack a few of my ponies too, which ones I’m not really sure as most could be re-bought easily. If I absolutely had to pick (which I guess I would) it would be the ones my friend made for me, that are styled after the three of us. One of my best friends went and customized three of them to look like us as ponies for my birthday. They are pretty small and wouldn’t take up much room as it is. By that standards I could probably throw in some of my smaller ones but depending where I’m moving to, I could get them for like 2$.

My phone and ipod would be with me instead of my suitcase as those two objects are glued to me. I never go anywhere without them. My phone is also a way that I keep in contact with my boyfriend as well, when I don’t have my Xbox or laptop near. My ipod is my giant music source and I hate not having music with me 24/7. I heavily rely on my music to keep me in good moods, or distract me from life or other things.

One thing I absolutely could not pick one thing for would be my stuffed animals. I have SO many and I adore every single one of them, I have been collecting stuffed animals since I was very little, and each one means so much to me. I had to put a bunch in two or three boxes because they didn’t fit in my room, and even I still have a bunch lying around everywhere in my room. So I really could not pick one. Once I was done packing I would probably grab one on my way out, which I don’t know, but it would sure be a spur of the moment.

I would probably grab my Resident Evil book series as well, as those books are really hard to find. They would be a nice reminder of the games as well, since I would have had to leave them behind, plus I haven’t finished reading them and I really want to finish them. They aren’t very big, so they wouldn’t take much room.

I guess that would be everything... I'm not really sure though. Something like that would really be a spur of the moment kind of thing. Plus who knows what you really could fit in the suitcase, they have so many different kinds, some even have a zipper to make them a little bigger. So I guess i'll go with those.